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Archive for May, 2007

To hell with hearings on steroids in baseball and all the braying about global warming.  Why isn’t Congress doing something about this?  How is it that we always ignore those who are truly in need?

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. . . . I bought gas today. What kind of Bolshevik, Sandinista, Jihad type thinking was that? Well, obviously, I must not love my country. How dare I line the bloated pockets of the true Axis Of Evil. Thanks to my unpatriotic duties, Tiger Marts, Kum & Go’s, and 7/11’s across the nation get to continue their quest to undermine the very principles that America was founded on. Even more harrowing than those selfish bastards is the little known Auxiliary Of Evil. This sinister organization of Mom and Pop gas stations and small groceries prey upon the weak and ignorant of small town America.

Go ahead, you valiant warriors for freedom, refrain from your one day of petrol purchases, bring the mighty gasoline giants to their knees. Ring that liberty bell and nail the doors of Ma and Pa’s only-store-for-hundreds-of-miles shut for good. After all, I am sure the full tanks that you bought on May 14 and 16 won’t boost ExxonMobileBritishPetroleumCitgo’s profit margins one bit.

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